Good evening fellow Glory hole frequenters,
As the title humbly points out, yes I am the best WOT player of all time. A proud boast you say..nope just facts. I have a 99% Win rate and a six digit every other metric invented by no life nerds that substitute stats for real life relationships.
I have 3 marked every tank in game..without leaving the Garage. My stats aren’t purple, oh no young tankers , they are the same colour as the Sun.
I once fired a shot in my gold plated Shitbarn from The zero line on Mines that one shotted an E-100 on Malinovka. The crew so badly mangled they changed Nationality. If I my shot pens your tank ( it will ) your crew will gain 3 perks.
I don’t use Gold ammo, I use ELC EVENs as ammo. If you face me in Randoms your stats will go down as fast as Laminate flooring.
CCs will often ask me for advice, I told Dez Gamez to wear a helmet when streaming as his face was scaring small kids. I trained Skills cat to operate his webcam and I painted that sailing ship Picture…. And i didn’t have all the time in the world of tanks to do it either.
I bought jingles his first Tog II and I taught Circon how to Flex. Foch started talking to me one time but I mistook him for a crack addict asking for money, so I just shoved a WG gift card into his claw like hands to get rid of him. I styled QBs hair..I based it on a Cornish Pastie.
I taught SerB all he knows about mens fashion…but I didn’t teach him all I know. How terrible.
I am the best. You can be too.