The Worst Tier 8 In the Game, A Sales Pitch

Do you like dealing damage?
Do you enjoy being effective in battle?
Do you relish at the opportunity of being able to kill your opponent in any way shape or form?

No? You hate all of those things?

Then do I have the tank for you!

Designed in 1946 when a short bus wrecked into a skate park by one of the surviving passengers, the AMX Chasseur de chars is the prime example of the phrase “Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should!”

This sleek, stylish vehicle sports twenty to thirty millimeters of paper-thin armor that is made almost entirely of ammo racks! Boasting a bulbously tall profile and a laughable fourteen hundred hit points, this vehicle is guaranteed to make sure you survive no more than four shells fired in your general direction, so you can get back to the garage and questioning your life choices at record speed!

Speaking of questioning, you’ll only have one question for God in the middle of your battles, “Why?”
As your 2000 DPM gun struggles to pen or hit almost everything! Watch in amazement as your 8-second reload cycles through in service to lob spitballs at your enemy. That is, if you can even see them before they hit you, as the AMX Crock De La Crap sports a measly 390 spotting view range as well.

But wait, there’s more! Despite sporting an impressive 1200 Horse Power engine and only weighing 34 tons, the CDC caps out at an absolutely laughable 57mph, ensuring alongside your tall profile that you wont be dodging -any- enemy bullets. Poor traverse speed and soft ground resistance mean that you’ll not be doing much flanking either. Add a camo rating that would make even the Maus blush and we guarantee an absolutely miserable experience with every click of the battle button.

We promise that this french oscillating trash can never fails to disappoint, as even the advertised ‘impressive’ gun impression amounts to only a measly -8 degrees, something which even its painfully average M4A1 Revolarise cousin puts to absolute shame.

Find out why this vehicle only requires 2500 average damage per battle to three mark, and get yours today for the low low price of 6700 gold!

Purchases of AMX CDC come with limited time only free rope and footstool, restrictions apply. Shove head inside own anus for details on this offer.

submitted by /u/CloakAndGrenade
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